"Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply." (Stephen R. Covey, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change.)
The concept underlying this quote has been known to mediators for a long time. One of my primary goals as a dispute resolution professional is always to listen with the intent to understand. This does not mean that I necessarily agree with everything I hear; understanding and agreement, after all, are often two very different things. But only by understanding what someone is saying - and why they are saying it - can I assist them in moving towards a resolution that meets their interests, satisfies their needs, and is ultimately acceptable to everyone involved.
The concept underlying this quote has been known to mediators for a long time. One of my primary goals as a dispute resolution professional is always to listen with the intent to understand. This does not mean that I necessarily agree with everything I hear; understanding and agreement, after all, are often two very different things. But only by understanding what someone is saying - and why they are saying it - can I assist them in moving towards a resolution that meets their interests, satisfies their needs, and is ultimately acceptable to everyone involved.
